(Note: traditional tune)

This old man, he fucked one,
Fucking one was so much fun.

*Chorus*
With a nick-nack paddy-wack,
Give a dog a bone,
This old man came rolling home.

This old man, he fucked two,
First a sheep,then a kangaroo.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked three,
Put up mirrors so he could see.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked four,
After three he bought a whore.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked five,
Two were dead and three alive.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked six,
Had his sister turning tricks.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked seven,
The youngest one was just eleven.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked eight,
Blown by one and it felt great.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked nine,
Thought the orgy quite divine.

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked ten,
Shouted out, "Let's go again!"

(Chorus)

This old man, he fucked eleven,
Died of pox and went to heaven.
With a nick-nack paddy-wack,
Give a dog a bone
That old man ain't coming home.